Galentine’s Day Ideas Inspired by Ladies of the 80s!

Galentine’s Day, otherwise referred to as Single Awareness Day, when all the single women ban together to tell each other “we are youngand “heartache to heartache we stand”. With the day fast approaching, many single ladies are scrambling to find something, anything, to keep their mind off being, yet again, painstakingly single on Valentine’s Day. Well, never fear, the chart-topping ladies of the 80s are here with a few unique places to spend this year’s Galentine’s Day (and their lips aren’t sealed).

Madonna made it through the wilderness at Camp.

Remember those camping trips when you were younger? You’d grab a group of friends, stuff your mom’s minivan, and gossip about boys while kissing the cover of the latest Tiger Beat Magazine and chowing down on double stuffed oreos. Well, the only thing that’s changed is the height of your heels and the direction of your ID. This Valentine’s Day grab your girlfriends and head over to Camp, a Boerum Hill bar resembling an Appalachian summer camp lodge. The bar is equipped with a watering hole, log walls, tree trunk stools, and a full size deer head. Feel free to roast a marshmallow in the fireplace while enjoying a vanilla martini and a giant game of Jenga. Bet you girls “didn’t know how lost you were until” you found Camp to help you “make it through” this Galentine’s Day.

179 Smith St. Brooklyn (718-852-8086, camp-brooklyn.com)

Spend the night in the Fish Bowl when “the tide is high, but you’re holding on”.

I hate to carry on with the bad news but you’re single and, surprise, Galentine’s Day is in the middle of winter. In other words, summer is a long ways away. However, “the tide is high” at the Fish Bowl as drinks steadily roll in and out of the bar. Located in the Dream Midtown hotel, the chic new Fish Bowl creates summertime vibes similar to a day on the boardwalk complete with two mini bowling alleys, arcade games, and Skee-ball machines. The 2,500 square foot lounge is equipped with a private photo booth, a rotating stage, and a two-story aquarium alive with exotic fish. Even though bikinis are optional at the Fish Bowl, the umbrella drinks are not, making this  your number one summertime lounge this winter.

Dream Midtown, 210 W 55th St. (646-756-2077, fishbowlnyc.com)

“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of…” The Brooklyn Chocolate Takedown)

The Brooklyn Chocolate Takedown is the place to be this Galentine’s Day, and “who am I to disagree”? You’ve traveled the world and the seven seas” looking for the perfect Galentine’s day activity and here it is. Head down to Brooklyn to experience The Takedown where you can indulge your taste buds with chocolate creations ranging from hot cocoa to ice cream cake and everything in between. Everybody’s looking for something”, but every single woman comes here for one thing; that tall, dark, and hand-held cup of decadent hot chocolate. Use the Brooklyn Chocolate Takedown to forget about that someone who used you. This place wants to be abused.

February 14. Royal Palms Shuffleboard Club, 514 Union St, Brooklyn (347-223-4410, thetakedowns.com). Noon-2pm; $20.

You’re a hissing cockroach. Don’t you mess around with me!”

Roses are red, violets are blue, name a cockroach after your ex at the Bronx Zoo! So he called you insane? Big deal. Show that heartbreaker, dream maker, love-taker” just how sane you are this Galentine’s Day.  Grab some single friends and head over to the Bronx Zoo. Not only does the zoo house over 6,000 animals from 650 different species in over 265 acres of park lands and habitats, this year there giving ladies, and gentlemen, the ultimate stint at revenge. For just $10 you can name a hissing cockroach after your ex. If you’re a big spender, $15 can even get you a printed certificate validating your insanity. Your ex probably is a hissing cockroach, and this Galentine’s Day you can prove it with a hiss.

2300 Southern Blvd, Bronx, NY 10460

“Girls just wanna have fun(ds)”.

“Oh mother dear we’re not the fortunate ones, and girls just wanna have” FUNDS. Being single on Valentine’s Day isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Look at it as a day you don’t have to spend next month’s mortgage on dinner and chocolate. Celebrate Galentine’s Day with a “30 Going On 13 Girls Night In” Galentine’s Day party. Be prepared for your girlfriends with a giant no boys allowed pillow fort. Rent last year’s hit Fifty Shades of Grey, pour out your boy tears (cheap wine), and order yourself a heart shaped pizza because tonight is all about the ladies. “Some boys take a beautiful girl and hide her away from the rest of the world”, but you’ll be the “one to walk in the sun” as you head to Duane Reade in the morning to splurge on all the Valentine’s Day candy sales. See, being single on Valentine’s day really isn’t so terrible.

Your super cute, no-boys-allowed king sized bed made for the queen herself.

Special thanks to our favorite 80s ladies for providing the lyrical inspiration:

Like a VirginMadonna

The Tide is HighBlondie

Sweet Dreams (Are Made of These)Eurythmics

HeartbreakerPat Benatar

Girls Just Wanna Have FunCyndi Lauper

Written by: Hana Gilbert  

Avoiding the Love Bugs this Season

As we’ve stressed and sweated our way through Holiday Season Fever, and are Vitamin C-ing our way through the flu season, it’s time to gather our home remedies and survive the last of the holiday colds; The Love Bug. Just as we’re coming off the New Year’s Eve high (or hangover), we are greeted by walls of red, pinks, and purple hearts all leading up to a giant stuffed bear holding an oversized “You’re Beary Cute” heart strategically sewn into its palm. For those of us lucky enough to have someone to spend Valentine’s Day with, the Love Bug nestles its way into our hearts, infecting us with kindergarten crushes, and in extreme cases, full blown love. For those of us who skipped relationship season, and possibly their flu shot, the Love Bug leaves us nauseated and haunted by the Valentine’s Day decor. Inevitably, each and every one of us will get hit but a Love Bug this season and it’s important to understand the symptoms, dangers, and remedies to surviving Love Bug Season:

 

The Love bug – Targets those romantically involved

Symptoms:

  • Individual is completely head over heels in love with someone, so much so everyone else in the room seems to disappear.
  • Seems to be falling too fast. Cannot control thoughts, feelings, and actions when significant other is not present.
  • Has entire future planned out with one person, including entire wedding and baby names.
  • High hopes for Valentine’s day similar to those of a hopeless romantic. Sometimes phrases such as “I think he’s the one” or “This may be the day” are excessively uttered.
  • Extreme cases: Eyes may turn into hearts.

 

Dangers:

  • Falling too fast or over-romanticizing Valentine’s Day can lead to getting caught up in the euphoria which opens the door for huge letdowns or big mistakes.
  • Planning for the future indicates the individual is more into the relationship than the person they’re in the relationship with.

 

Remedies:

  • Don’t abandon reality; keep your expectations in check. It’s okay to feel caught up in passion, but be in control of your own thoughts and feelings. Don’t get so caught up in the other person you lose sight of both your own feelings and your reality. Keeps those baby names and wedding plans in your head, and wait for the bond to become genuine with time.
  • Take things slow. Spend time with your friends, but don’t bore them with a rerun of True Life: I’m in a Relationship and I’m so in Love. Time apart is necessary for a healthy relationship.
  • Avoid jumping into a relationship or proposal simply because you’ve been bitten by the Love Bug which has caused impulsive or irrational decision making. Valentine’s Day can sometimes lead to saying or doing things you don’t really mean. Wait to say “I love you” until you’re absolutely ready and comfortable.
  • Similarly, don’t be upset if your little blue box is a necklace and not a Diamond ring.  Remember, the morning after will always be February 15th, and on this day your significant other will love you just as much as the day before.

 

The Love Bug – Targets those NOT romantically involved

Symptoms:

  • Bitter or jealous of those who are not single.  
  • Experiences waves of nausea when entering department stores loaded with Valentine’s day decor and/or presents.
  • Seems to have gone into hiding or avoids any contact with the outside world because they, “Don’t wanna catch a cold”.
  • Cancels on Girls Nights because of “work related issues”, but is found in a queen size bed, crying hysterically through the credits of Water for Elephants with an empty pint of fudge brownie ice cream and a mountain of used, double quilted tissues beside her.
  • Breakup playlists found on shared Spotify accounts.
  • Extreme cases: May wear all black and throw an “I Hate Valentine’s Day” party.

 

Dangers:

  • Because you’re single, it may be tempting to cave with the pressure and jump into an unnecessary relationship. The stakes are higher due to Love Bug Season and can lead to greater disappointment, inevitably causing one minor Love Bug bump to become a full blown rash.

 

Remedies:

  • If you’re recently single, spend Valentine’s day with friends and family you love. Don’t get jealous of other people’s relationships. Instead, admire their love while focusing on yourself or your time with friends.
  • Buy some of those Valentine’s Day candies or that giant “You’re Beary Cute” stuffed bear. Science explains that both the bear and the chocolate heart may be enough to suppress the loneliness. Chocolate has a number of compounds (about 380) that affect our brain chemistry eliciting the same feelings as love. And the giant stuffed bear can help fill the insecurity void many people experience when they’re single.
  • Use Valentine’s Day to find another partner. Many places have single’s night which can be a fun experience. If you’re not looking to enter the dating scene right now, try volunteering activities to spread love to those less fortunate. They too have to suffer through Love Bug Season.
  • Don’t feel sorry for yourself or compare your relationship status to those around you. Even if you choose to stay in for the night watching sappy movies and eating frosting by the spoonful, remember not to dwell on your single status. Being single doesn’t have to be bad. It’s the perfect time for self-reflection. Perhaps you’re holding back and haven’t realized it yet. Use this time to expand your perspective on life and open doors to new relationships and experiences.
  • Don’t waste the day because you want to avoid it. Make this day about loving you. Pamper yourself; buy that expensive dress you’ve been eyeing. You love yourself, so why not make February 14th, the day of love, a day to celebrate your self-love.

 

Written by Hana Gilbert

The Online Genius: Pics with Pets

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We asked NY singles what their top pet-phobias are and this is what they had to say.

  • Owning a cat

 Despite all of the cat popularity online these days, many singles are saying no to cat lovers. Maybe it’s because cats are portrayed as evil in cartoons. Or maybe it’s because cat-loathers are jealous of their nine lives. Whatever the reason is, a cat in your online dating profile is a huge DON’T!

Women with cats are often labeled as crazy cat ladies. Meanwhile, men with cats are a complete miss with single NY women. Women believe these men are weird AF. Our suggestion is to limit the publicity your cat gets especially if you’re online dating. Despite all this cat popularity online these days, many singles are saying 

  • Women who treat their dogs like humans.

Dressing your dog up for Halloween, buying special treats for your his birthday and including your dog in the family Christmas cards are gestures both your canine and society, will deem acceptable. But there is a certain line to be drawn. There are a number of New York City dogs groomed like A-list celebrities. The worst is when dogs are carried around in a stroller. Truth be told, your chances of actually meeting a sugar-owner are generally quite low, but if you live in the Big Apple you’ve definitely seen a pet in a Chanel handbag. This type of overindulgence might cost you a date or two.

  • Men and women with more pictures of pets than of the owner

You know the feeling when a parent wants to document every moment in their newborn’s life. Imagine if their baby could never grow up to tell them to stop being annoying. This is how everyone feels about your ‘baby’. Your dog is cute and all but people will stop caring after a while, and start thinking you’re just plain crazy. If you’re going to post pictures of your cat all day long, our experts suggest making her a separate Instagram account for her pics (people love that) – and to keeping them out of your dating profile.

Although there are pets with successful careers as wingmen, some pets will actually ruin your chances of finding love. When dealing with online dating it’s best to mention that you have a pet in your bio, but focus the rest of the profile on yourself. Let them fall for you first and then they’ll stay for your pet later, I promise.

Written by Christina Madera

Christina Madera is our hilariously bright Business and Communications Intern.

Did you know that Project Soulmate offers professional photo coaching and other management services for your online dating accounts?

Jane Rudes is a Communication Consultant and our Online Division Director at Project Soulmate. Jane is happy to speak with any interested, prospective clients about our online dating services and answer questions about online profiles or other common online dating woes.

Click here for more info!  Or Contact Us and ask!

Find more genius advice by checking out some of our other Online Dating Genius posts like:  

The Height Exaggeration, The Offspring Pic, The Hot Chick In Your Pic, or The Not Your Baby Pic and more!

Find more good stuff here: Twitter: @projectsoulmate   Facebook: Like us!   Pinterest:  Project Soulmate

Gift Ideas For Your Significant Other

 

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas so prepare your wallets to give your date the best gift ever. Here are a few grand slam ideas to make your significant other love you forever:

For boys: Treat him to tickets to his favorite sports team. Boys love sports because sports= beer and tailgating. What better way to celebrate than with his favorite hobbies. This way he can enjoy something he loves and with someone he loves.

Ticketmaster.com

Give him the gift of time with a new fossil watch. You want your man to look nice for you, give him an accessory he can use for multiple occasions, like going to work or going out with his friends.

Sold in store’s at Fossil

Spice things up by giving him Dior Cologne, its a masculine scent that is superb for men who admire the smell of cologne. It’s known for being simple, sophisticated and pure.

Purchase at Macy’s

This holiday always make sure your man look fresh and is clean shaved. You can’t bring home to the parents looking like a grizzly bear. Check out the mancave’s original man’s grooming kit sold in stores at Target.

Treat your man to something more intimate with a personalized gift. This holiday give him a personalized whiskey barrel, with its peak flavor it’s aged to fulfill his taste buds to perfection.

Find at Brookstone

For the girls: A night out on the town in The Big Apple with dinner and followed by ice-skating at the Rockefeller center. Treat her to a fancy dinner and a hot chocolate while you skate around the tree.

Show her how much she means to you by defining the relationship with a Tiffany bracelet or pair of earrings. Give her this lavish gift that she can show off to her friends. This simple gesture that will remind her of you every time she wears it.

Find at Tiffany & Co

Coco Chanel perfume is a fruity floral scent that is light and fresh. Allure her senses with the gift of enchantment.

In store’s at Macy’s

Winter is a harsh time for dry skin, especially dry hands. With the Philosophy handbook set you can’t go wrong. It’s accessible and comes in travel size so it’s easily reachable. This way you always have a soft hand to hold.

Find in Ulta beauty store

Women love to wine. It comes in various brands and predominately in two broad colors, red and white. Now the dilemma becomes whether to carry it or use a picnic basket. However there’s a resolution for that, with this reliable spill proof wine caddy. It comes in lively colors and holds up to two liter bottles of wine.

Purchase at proof caddy spartina449.com

 

 

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WRITTEN BY: Holly Kiffer

Which Dating App is Best for You?

dating-app

 

Online dating apps thrive off of this never ending cycle of familiarization. You have to get to know someone virtually before you get to know them personally. Liking, messaging, meeting…the whole 9 yards. But even before you get to know him, you have to get to know the dating app. *Sighs*  

Our love experts have reviewed the top dating apps so you can quit trying to figure out the apps and start finding love:

  1. Tinder is a great app to use if you have a tight schedule. It’s very simple to use as most dating apps are. The app allows you to sign in with your Facebook account and once your location services are on you’re ready to start swiping. To the right means you like them and to the left means you’re uninterested. If you’re interested you can click on the profile picture and below it will display ‘common connections’ aka the mutual friends you share so that you can traditionally stalk him or her by asking your friends what they know about “Jack, 21.”
  2. Coffee Meets Bagel is ‘the’ app for introverts. It asks for some information upfront including ethnicity, height, occupation, and hobbies so you don’t have to. One thing that makes this app unique is that it requires an explanation of what you’d appreciate in a date. This helps narrow down who you’re compatible with even before connection. The app will also send you a bagel each day which is a strategic match based off of your interests. This app gets to know how you like your coffee first so that can meet your bagels with ease.
  3. Bumble is the app for the modern woman. On Bumble, only women can make the first move and initiate conversation.When the woman swipes right (similar to Tinder) she has 24 hours to message the guy or she will lose the match. If he does not respond to her message within 24 hours the match is also lost.  This definitely speeds up the process of getting to know a potential. However, it may filter out potential male dates who may not like the idea of waiting for a message.
  4. Happn has a more relaxed vibe. You can only see the profiles of people you’ve crossed paths with in the real world. You will only be able to message each other after you’ve both ‘liked’ each other. This makes breaking the ice easier because you will be able to share experiences you’ve made at the mutual location. Maybe it’s your favorite restaurant or his terrible date.
  5. Howaboutwe is for those looking for more face-to-face contact and less digital dating. The selling point is that you have to describe your perfect date scenario (a walk on the beach or a dinner and a movie) to create an account. From there you can use their play page which gives you a fun way to find dates. One ‘game’ on the play page is the “speed date.” This simply means you will be presented with other user profiles and date ideas and you have to select yes or no (similar to Tinder’s swipe right or left). Another interesting feature is Tonight, which lets users pick date ideas in real time in hopes of encouraging impromptu dates.

With all of the dating apps available, it can be difficult to pick one that’s right for you. Since most of the apps are relatively safe, millionaire matchmaker Jennifer Zucher suggests testing out a few and figuring out which app will best satisfy your individual needs.

 

Written by Christina Madera

Can a relationship with a flirt work?

flirt

We all know the best way to get into the Halloween spirit is with a scary story. Here’s mine: Girl falls for a flirt – the end.

 

Whether you think flirting is when he likes her pictures on Instagram or when she laughs too loudly at his jokes, one thing is for certain: There is no universal definition for ‘flirting.’ Seriously, try looking up ‘flirt’ on any search engine. What you’ll find is its textbook definition and pronunciation. What you’ll miss are the negative connotations associated with the word. Cheater, sinner, dog.

 

Today, we associate flirting with feelings of jealousy, anger, and irritation. Describe your lover as a “flirt” to anyone in your circle and watch as they convince you your relationship has 7 days to live.

 

Millionaire Matchmaker Lori Zaslow says flirting will not ruin a relationship and here are the reasons why:

 

Flirting does not always mean there is attraction.

Some people flirt for 5 seconds of attention and then move on. Others flirt to chase the rush they get when interacting with someone new. I flirt for free drinks (and I know I’m not the only one). The truth is everyone flirts; from married adults to children. Flirting is a natural thing and it’s meant to be casual and playful.

 

If your potential partner-to-be enjoys a good flirt session every now and then it’s fine. That does not mean that they find another woman more attractive than you or that you’ve lost your touch. Stop overthinking it: Flirting is just flirting.

 

Flirting can be a good thing.

Flirting makes you feel good and boosts your self-confidence. Think about how bomb you feel when a woman notices you’ve been working out. It doesn’t matter if the woman is your best friend’s 65-year-old grandmother. A genuine compliment will not only spark up a conversation but it will make someone’s day as well.

 

Studies show that flirting is healthy for you. It is said that positive initial impressions caused by flirting releases dopamine into our brains.

 

Flirting is not cheating.

Flirting will never be cheating. There are only two types of people that confuse flirting for cheating:

 

  1. To the overly jealous uber sensitive type: You consider nearly everything as cheating. Messaging other men, dancing with other women, and even having friends of the opposite sex. You are ruining your relationship because you jump to conclusion the minute you get a flirtatious vibe. Unfortunately, there does not exist a single person walking on this earth that won’t flirt. If you can’t deal with innocent flirting then you should stay a bachelor(ette). The harsh reality is if they tell you they don’t flirt, they either don’t know when they’re flirting or they’re a good liar and definitely flirt behind closed doors.

 

To avoid losing your relationship to insecurities get to know your partner better. If you know your SO personality well enough then you will easily be able to tell when they are only flirting. You should trust that your partner would not cheat on you just because they can.

 

  1. The disrespectful type: You consider nearly everything to be flirting. From hidden sexual innuendos to physical and inappropriate touching. These things are not flirting they’re gross. You are ruining your relationship because you’re flirting with the idea of being single. You are just touching the boundaries line when you should be far from it. Your actions are making your partner doubt you and you’re sending mixed signals to those who you’re “flirting” with.  

 

To avoid losing your relationship don’t do this. No one deserves to be disrespected especially not by the person they respect the most.

 

So the answer is yes! A relationship with a flirt can work because everyone is a flirt. As long as you know your partner and trust them, flirting should not be an issue to sleep on the couch over. The only way flirting will ruin a relationship is if you let it. Flirting is just flirting.

 

Written by Christina Madera

Online Dating Genius: The Sunglass Psycho

screenshot-2016-09-13-18-51-11

Once upon a high school, I had a crush on this boy named Brendon. He was just my type; tall, athletic, and smart. A true triple threat that I couldn’t get enough of. I loved everything about him from his dirty gym sneakers to his worn out baseball cap he never took off…or so I thought. One afternoon after practice, I caught a glimpse of him as he was walking out of the locker room, as he always did – except this time without his favorite orange and blue ‘Bulldogs’ cap.

I learned a very valuable lesson that day; never trust anyone who is wearing a hat. I learned to stay away from “those kind” at a young age, however, as I grew older those kind started evolving. Hat-wearing was replaced with something even more disguising – sunglasses.

What’s so sinful about wearing sunglasses you ask? Everything.

Wearing sunglasses can make you appear unapproachable. Although many may think celebrities sport their designer shades everywhere to look cool, this isn’t really the case – having a million dollars already makes them look cool. Celebrities wear them because they actually don’t want to be approached, and that’s okay. Unfortunately, you are not famous and being approachable is a quality you’ll need when applying for jobs – and especially with online dating.

Wearing shades can cause you to look, well, shady. What are you trying to hide? A few crows feet? Dark circles? We all have our list of imperfections, but when online dating it is better to have full disclosure about your appearance than to try to hide your insecurities. Either way, if and when the person behind the screen chooses to meet with you for coffee, they’re going to discover who you really are. Best to not waste anyone’s time, and avoid looking like an “A-hole”.

Wearing sunglasses in your profile picture is equivalent to adding too much filter in a photo:

superedited

Now, I’m not saying that you must remove sunglasses before all pics, nor that you don’t have the right to dislike how you look underneath those shades. Beach photos, barbecue pics, baseball game memories; share all of that with us. We want to know you’re a fun person that protects your eyes when necessary. Just don’t choose a shot with sunglasses on as your profile picture. Choose one where your eyes are visible and you’re smiling, preferably. Make the first impression count.

Research shows that eye blockage in a profile picture can decrease your likability by -0.36. It only takes one click for anyone to move on to that next profile. Everyone knows the portal to one’s soul lies within the eyes. Covering them may be blocking true love from finding you. Free the pupils!

Written by Christina Madera

Christina Madera is our hilariously bright Business and Communications Intern.

Did you know that Project Soulmate offers professional photo coaching and other management services for your online dating accounts?

Jane Rudes is a Communication Consultant and our Online Division Director at Project Soulmate. Jane is happy to speak with any interested, prospective clients about our online dating services and answer questions about online profiles or other common online dating woes.

Click here for more info!  Or Contact Us and ask!

Find more genius advice by checking out some of our other Online Dating Genius posts like:  

The Height Exaggeration, The Offspring Pic, The Hot Chick In Your Pic, or The Not Your Baby Pic and more!

Find more good stuff here: Twitter: @projectsoulmate   Facebook: Like us!   Pinterest:  Project Soulmate

 

Online Dating Genius: The Impossible Checklist

onlinegenius2

We all know an impossible checklist person. You click on their online dating profile and instead of beginning with a casual introduction, they bombard you with their list of deal-breakers.

  • Can’t have too many tattoos
  • MUST love dogs
  • Part Zebra
  • 6 feet tall (no exceptions)
  • Needs to know how to pronounce ‘worcestershire’

You see what I’m getting at here.

These kind of people are annoying for many reasons. I could write a list about it but I would hate to be put in the same category as a listomaniac.

Compulsive list makers are successful in the workforce and in the grocery aisle. However, lists are inadequate in dating, especially in the online dating department. The problem is that you just can’t plan out love online like you plan out a To-Do list.

In essence, having an idea of core qualities you would like in a partner is not a terrible thing. For instance, everyone can agree they’re looking for someone funny, smart, and attractive. Three key qualities – just three – and yet with 7 billion people in the world it is still difficult to even find someone who embodies this trinity of characteristics, especially while dating online. Add any more qualities to this list and you’ll have better luck finding Waldo.

Having overly specific “wants” can be equally as bad as having a long list of requirements. Take this list of core qualities for example. If you’re looking for someone funny but with a dry sense of humor, someone smart but who graduated from an Ivy League university, and an attractive face but with a side of six pack abs… Your only option left is James Franco and he is clearly not on match.com! As your lists become longer and more precise, your list of potential online dates shrinks. This is because as you’re being particular about hair color, occupation and music taste, you’re losing many chances to meet great people who just don’t fully meet your impossible idea of “perfect”.  

Is your list even for yourself? You rarely know what to order at a restaurant, yet you know exactly what you want in a partner? Try again. If you’re creating this list in hopes of finding someone to impress your parents or to one-up your ex, remember it’s you who is going to end up unhappy and deprived of love.

Bravo matchmaker Jennifer Zucher knows that lists are impractical and promote unrealistic expectations. “Your friends have qualities you like and qualities you dislike, yet you still work great together. Why? Because you enjoy the moments you spend with each other and you don’t dwell on your differences. Honestly, what if your millionaire match is a cat person instead of a dog lover? Is that fraction of their personality enough to disqualify them entirely? You are the reason you’re single. If you’re looking for someone who is 100 percent your perfect match, date yourself! No one on this planet is perfect and if you want a one of a kind love you need to let go of the list and let love lead.”

Written by Christina Madera

Christina Madera is our hilariously bright Business and Communications Intern.

Did you know that Project Soulmate offers professional photo coaching and other management services for your online dating accounts?

Jane Rudes is a Communication Consultant and our Online Division Director at Project Soulmate. Jane is happy to speak with any interested, prospective clients about our online dating services and answer questions about online profiles or other common online dating woes.

Click here for more info!  Or Contact Us and ask!

Find more genius advice by checking out some of our other Online Dating Genius posts like:  

The Height Exaggeration, The Offspring Pic, The Hot Chick In Your Pic, or The Not Your Baby Pic

Find more good stuff here: Twitter: @projectsoulmate   Facebook: Like us!   Pinterest:  Project Soulmate

 

What makes a Good Wingman

wing manIf your best friend has ever shoved you right into your crush, you have been part of the wingman movement.

They’re at your local bars, clubs, even that hipster coffee shop on the corner. Wingmen walk among average New Yorkers just waiting to volunteer as tribute for a friend in need. She has an ugly friend? Get yourself a wingman. You’re a little shy? You know who to call.

Being a wingman is often a rite of passage into brotherhood. But can having a wingman actually get you a girl? Matchmaking expert Lori Zaslow has the tips to help you wing maneuver  your way into a woman’s heart.

Who? A wingman is like a television host. They must be gregarious, charismatic, and full of positive energy. Not everyone can be behind a TV screen, likewise not old friend can be a wingman. A good wingman has to have an unflagging determination to help you score. Whether this means distracting her other friends, interfering when other guys trying to land the same girl, or stepping in during the awkward silences.

Your wingman must also reflect who you are. If your wingman is much more attractive than you are, the girl you’re eyeing might fall for your buddy instead of you. If your wingman is unattractive, then the girls may walk away from him before he even introduces you. It sounds harsh (I know) but in order to have a successful chance you need a wingman who is equally as attractive.

Why? There are many added benefits to utilizing a wingman. Even for the most confident stud, having a wingman is an advantage over going out solo. Women often go out in groups and stick by each other for most of the night. Success during a girls night out can be laborious and often impossible without any backup. A good wingman will take the difficult task of breaking the ice so that by the time you waltz in everyone is in a good mood.

A wingman can help keep the flow of the conversation going by adding parts of a story you may have missed. He or she should also try to make you look good, but in a subtle way. For instance, instead of saying how great of a guy you are, a good wingman would reference a time where you went out of your way to help a friend.

How? Your wingman is there to give a pep talk when needed and ease an introduction, however, the rest is up to you. If you are not confident enough to speak for yourself, you will always miss your chance. Approaching a person for the first time is not always the easiest task. But, by keeping a positive mindset before and during your interaction you can release some of the stress that comes from getting to know someone and enjoy the conversation. 

It is easier to approach women when you have a wingman willing to take the loss with you if you get denied – and if you’re dating in NYC, you know this is not a rare occurrence. Having a wingman can only help you get a girl if both of you are confident and cool – it can’t be solely one of you playing the game.

So the answer is yes! The wingman thing still works fellas, you just need to find the right ‘bro’ to take to the bar.

 

Written by Christina Madera

 

online dating photos

Online Dating Genius: The Group Picture

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Let’s talk about this important DON’T in online dating: pictures with friends

I call these type of people beauty blenders. They love being in group pictures because it’s kind of like choir; you can’t really tell who has the terrible voice when there are so many harmonizing. Their online profiles are filled with pictures of with friends, family, and coworkers. You can’t even really see what he or she looks like because most of the pictures are dark, blurry, and crowded. Capital NO

We get it: you may be shy – too shy – to ask someone to take a picture of you or maybe you just look your best when you’re just a floating head behind your biff’s shoulders. Whatever your excuse is; this is a huge mistake for online dating.

For starters, it’s so confusing. You are one of 5 girls in the picture all with brown hair and a drink in your hand. You are making it a guessing game for anyone viewing your profile, which is bothersome to most. If you truly love the way you look in the picture, crop everyone out or add a comment that pinpoints exactly which brunette you are. The focus should be on you, not your posse.

Second, do your friends even know that they’re on a dating website? Not everyone is open to the idea of their image spreading throughout the internet. Not only is it creepy, it’s also highly inappropriate (especially if it’s a drunk selfie).

Lastly, it’s deceiving. You may have taken “if you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,” too seriously. The spice girls were all jaw droppingly gorgeous movie stars (not saying that you’re not pretty in pink as well) but, what if the person behind the computer screen is actually falling for your friend instead of you? Is this part of your master plan?

Dating scams are never the way to go. Eventually, the person will figure out that you’re not who you claim to be. Be honest and you will find people who truly want to date you for you.

One – maybe two – group pictures with friends is acceptable. It paints a picture of a social butterfly who is likeable and fun. But once you pass a third – strike, you’re out. Bottom line is many people are already hesitant about dating online because of the lack of face to face. So in order to ease their search, you need to show your face! Group photos are a concrete example of poor online dating etiquette.

Written by Christina Madera

Christina Madera is our hilariously bright Business and Communications Intern.

 

Find more genius advice by checking out some of our other Online Dating Genius posts like:  

The Height Exaggeration, The Offspring Pic, The Hot Chick In Your Pic, or The Not Your Baby Pic

Did you know that Project Soulmate offers professional photo coaching and other management services for your online dating accounts?

Click here for more info!  Or Contact Us and ask!

Jane Rudes is a Communication Consultant and our Online Division Director at Project Soulmate. Jane is happy to speak with any interested, prospective clients about our online services and answer questions about your online profile or other common online dating woes.

 

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